SchadenFriday: Render Unto Caesar

Jul 14 2006 Published by under Uncategorized

Jackass creationist, theme-park owner and professional lunatic Kent Hovind was arrested on 58 federal charges.


Hovind, a.k.a. Dr. Dino, is best known for claiming to have obtained a level of education that puts him on par with professional scientists. He is also no stranger to the inside of a courtroom:

In April, Circuit Judge Michael Allen ordered the buildings at Dinosaur Adventure Land closed because Hovind failed to obtain a building permit during the 2002 construction. The outdoor theme park was allowed to stay open.

That's right, our good Christian friend apparently doesn't care about the importance of building codes at a theme park. I guess if kids die in your park because a roof caves on them, they go to heaven faster.
What's he on trial for this time?

In the indictment unsealed Thursday, a grand jury alleges that Kent Hovind failed to pay $473,818 in federal income, Social Security and Medicare taxes on employees at his Creation Science Evangelism/Ministry between March 31, 2001, and Jan. 31, 2004.

How does he think he can get away with this behavior?

Kent Hovind, who often calls himself "Dr. Dino," has been sparring with the IRS for at least 17 years on his claims that he is employed by God, receives no income, has no expenses and owns no property.

So the money is god's, the property is god's, the expenses are god's. I guess that means the responsibility for Kent's actions is also god's. Yeah, that will fly in a court of law.
Way to go, Kent. You deserve whatever you get.

22 responses so far

  • They took his church's guns too.
    That must damn near cripple a church.

  • c u n d gulag says:

    Another nut!
    Hey, everybody, IT'S RAPTURE TIME!!!
    Jesus: "Let me ask you, Son, have you followed what I preached?"
    Rapture Rick: "Yes, Lord. I love you and the Bible. I've hated all of the God-damned Jew's and Muslim's and all other heathen's and non-believer's. I've taught my children to hate them too, and they do. They're true believer's!
    And if my neighbor's stray from your path I tell them loudly that they are the anti-Christ's. I had a co-worker once who was a Buddhist. Some church member's and I torched the heathen's house.
    Now, do I need these clothes, or do I ditch them?"
    Jesus: "Ditch them. Where you're going, it'll be too hot to wear them."
    Whoooooooosh!!!
    Jesus: "Didn't any of these people here read my book?"
    Jesus: "Hey you, come over here! what do you believe in?"
    Liberal: "Who, me? Tolerance towards others. Kindness for all. Help for the needy. Do unto other's as you would have them do unto you."
    Jesus: Do you believe in me, Jesus?"
    Liberal: "I'm not sure. I believe that all religions have truth in them. There are an infinite number of way's to reach God, if you believe that there is one."
    Jesus: "Come on in, Son. And thanks for buying my book."
    Liberal: "I'm sorry, Jesus, I don't even remember reading it..."
    Jesus" "That's o.k., you understand what I wanted you to, anyway.
    By the way, keep your clothes. The old-man has the AC cranked up this millennium. The temperature's gone up ever since all of my loud-mouth believers are adding to the fire's of Hell"
    Come on, Evangelical right-wingers, read the book! No, not just the 1st part, the 2nd half, too!

  • R Roger Beck says:

    Hilarious!
    Respectfully request permission to reprint (with proper credit, of course) on my website.
    There's a lot of very clever people out here
    in the blogosphere

  • Evil Monkey says:

    What's mine is yours. Although I'd appreciate a link!

  • Dr Who says:

    Just a quick reality check to the author of this site, and on the original story... how many CONVICTIONS has Kent Hovind been sentanced to?
    I'll save you the troulbe of looking them up.. NONE. Out of 58 charges, all have been dropped. Why have they been dropped you may ask?
    Because the supposed "tax evasion" , was taxes the government was trying to charge his MINISTRY!! And as you know.. religous groups are NOT supposed to be taxed by the government.
    Just like the Duke rape allegations ... these charges are bogus. And people like you jump all over it, because you hate creationism, and are christaphobic.
    Not only that, but the dino park and charges are completely unrelated. Hovind is not charged with any wrongdoing when it comes to the park, rather with his MINISTRY expenses.
    The way this really pans out is the US government, via the IRS, is persecuting a religous organization, making them prove their tax exempt status.
    Seems like a coordinated attack on someone who consistantly shoots down the foolish theories of evolution .. which you and your readers are ideologically bound to, even though the "facts" don't match your theories.
    Have a good day while gloating over someones persecution, and unjust prosecution.

  • Evil Monkey says:

    Since the charges were just filed on the 13th, this is extremely unlikely. But hey, how about that citation? I'll be waiting.

  • JoeBob says:

    Sure thing, Dr Who. The Bush administration goes around persecuting Creation Science charlatans. Next you'll want us to believe that Iraq is better now than it was 4 years ago, and Joe Lieberman is a real Democrat.
    What flavor is that pitcher of Kool-Aid®? Mind if I take a drink?

  • Evil Monkey says:

    Noooooooo JoeBob, don't do it!!!!!

  • Mike says:

    Dr. Who, let me show you an easier way of spewing stupid:
    OMFG!!!11!! TEH GOBERNMENT ND TEH REBLECANS HATEZ0rS TEH CHRISTANS!!!!11!!!
    Trust me, it saves space and the time of the intelligent.

  • stellans says:

    Hey Dr. Who -- somebody owes FICA taxes on the employees. So who does ol' Kent say employs those people? I'd guess the IRS knows.

  • LiberalAK says:

    Why is it that every time a person expreses a religious point of view these so called "liberals" jump all over him, and call him names like "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot"?
    http://www.liberalsmustdie.com/Home/tabid/36/BlogID/8/ParentBlogID/1/Default.aspx

  • kmlisle says:

    Dr Who,
    As a former church board member I know that churches are required to pay social security and medicare taxes on their employees. Just because Dr Dino is hiding behind his church organization does not mean he was not involved in denying social security and medicare benefits to employees of the ministry? Doesn't sound like ministering to their emplyees was a high priority. Wonder who ended up with the extra money.
    A Religious Liberal (one of millions)
    "Render unto Ceasar that which is Ceasars"

  • Evil Monkey says:

    Why is it that every time a person expreses a religious point of view these so called "liberals" jump all over him, and call him names like "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot"?

    Obviously you've never met someone who buys Kent Hovind's crap, or Kent Hovind, and listen to them try to pass off bullshit as good science. Don't you find it weird that you're basically "accusing" liberals of supporting sound science?
    Since we're all about the rhetoric today: Why is it every time someone expresses a liberal point of view, some jerk links to a website called "liberalsmustdie"?
    Another irony meter bites the dust.

  • plum says:

    LiberalAK:- Thank you so much for the link you provided. It speaks the real truth about those godless liberals.
    For the rest of you heathens who are TOO AFRAID to click through to http://www.liberalsmustdie.com, here is an outrageous story of liberal perfidy from this trusted Christian news source. Avoid pondering it at your peril:

    They [liberals] claim that their religion is "science" and based on facts.
    The only problem is that if you show them facts that prove the existance of God they either claim the facts are wrong or simply get angry and try to change the subject.
    A perfect example of this is that children of righteous families tend to not get sick, and have no need for vaccines, mostly because God ensures that they are healthy and happy.
    But now the 'Christian Science Monitor' Staff is being threatened by an outbreak of measles

    If you clicked through to the liberalsmustdie story, then you can claim super-duper extra credit outrage points. But if you went instead to the gawker.com story, you will have gained a different understanding. Here's the skinny:
    A Christian Scientist in Boston was found to have a rare form of measles. Now, Christian Scientists don't all believe in vaccination, so many of the CSM reporters haven't had the jab. After health officials warned them of the consequences, they "grudgingly" began to get vaccinations, apparently out of concern that if even one CSMer was infected, a quarantine on all non-vaccinated staff would have to be imposed.
    The gawker.com story ends with a snide (but only just) comment: "For properly vaccinated editorial assistants, it could be quite the opportunity."
    From which liberalsmustdie reaches the following conclusion:

    I didn't think that liberal would stoop so low as to deliberately infect young children just so they could give a big "I told you so" to these church going folks, but it looks like this is exactly what has happened.

    Members of the CSM have not been forced to get vaccinated as an insurance policy against a liberal biological attack against their office.

    Democrats will do anything to silence their enemy, even if it means killing their children with biological weapons.

    Alan Jones, I have found your doppelganger, and he is not vaccinated.

  • plum says:

    OMG, liberalsmustdie.com has got to be the best comedy site this site of Jon Stevens.
    In another priceless story the owner of the site asserts the completely unoriginal idea that you can be liberal or you can be Christian, but you can't be both.
    To prove his point, he tells of how he once corraled a guy with a Kerry bumper sticker who was walking from his car to the church. Mr liberalsmustdie harangued him at great length and flatly refused to allow the evil liberal enter the house of God, actually going so far as to physically place hiimself between the liberal and the church door.
    And then, get this, when the Kerry supporter turned around to go back to his car, Mr liberalsmustdie blamed him for turning his back on God.
    Seriously, this kind of Christianity surely must qualify as a mental disorder.

  • (: Tom :) says:

    Why is it that every time a person expreses a religious point of view these so called "liberals" jump all over him, and call him names like "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot"?
    That's funny - I don't seem to notice anyone unfairly persecuting c u n d gulag for his extremely religious point of view. Just the full-goose bat$hit insane Reich wing Putsch fellator who turns a blind eye to the sins of his brand of superstitious nonsense as long as he can make thirty pieces of silver off of it at the expense of his fellow man.

  • Jeffery Keown says:

    I think Liberalsmustdie.com is a parody site. No one could be that lame unless it were purposeful.

  • Evil Monkey says:

    That's what I said about Hovind's site the first time I saw it...

  • Monado says:

    The Christian Science Monitor staff weren't threatened by a rare form of measles but by a rare case of measles. It's rare because measles passes only from person to person and because most people are now vaccinated or live in population pools of less than one million.
    But if a sizeable percentage refuse vaccination, they endanger all because for many of us, immunity from our childhood innoculations or diseases has faded. That's not a very Christian thing to do!

  • Sib says:

    [quote][i]Why is it that every time a person expreses a religious point of view these so called "liberals" jump all over him, and call him names like "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot"?[/i][/quote]
    Why is it that every time a religious fundy gets caught breaking laws AND commandments in a flagrant manner and get called on it, there are people who whine that they are being persecuted because of their religious point of view?
    To paraphrase a lovely quote by I-can-not-remember-who-at-the-moment:
    He is not being called a "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot" because he is religious ... he is being called a "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot" because he IS a "dumbass", "moron", and "idiot"

  • Tenspace says:

    Dr. Who is telling a fib. The charges were not dropped. This is from today's Pensacola News Journal:
    "Pensacola evangelist Kent Hovind pleaded not guilty Monday to a 58-count federal indictment after saying he did not recognize the government's right to try him on tax-fraud charges."
    Why would someone enter a plea if the charges were dropped?

  • whatevermynameis says:

    Notice the fact he isn't using Glen Stoll who calls himself Hovind's attorney.
    I think the Public Defender thinks Hovind is a nut. The trial should be quite amusing. Judges usually don't tolerate such nutball antics in their court and give the party a very nasty slap in the ruling.

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