Steve at Omnibrain has been discussing a deep-fried turkey and turducken event in the back channels, and that has led some of us to ponder the ramifications of deep-frying a turducken itself. In the spirit of that discussion, I wrote a really dumb poem. I also apologize that it is rife with inside jokes. Any sciblings I left out, sorry, but there are just too damn many of us.
Fried turducken makes me choke
Fried turducken is for the blokes
I do not like it on a log
I do not like it with a sprog
I would not eat it with a carrot
I do not like it with a parrot
You can stuff it wearing socks
You can stuff it 'round the clock
I would not eat it in a pinch
I would not eat it getting lynched
I would not eat it, man, no way
It would likely give me MRSA
Fried turducken will clog our hearts
I would not feed it to old farts
I would not eat turducken since
It's probably stuffed with Insolence
Turducken is the latest flap
To be stuffed with liberal crap
I don't get you turducken goons
Ain't it stuffed with Kansas loons?
I realize that I'm quite defiant
I would not share it with a physics giant (Chad really is 9 feet tall)
I realize some hold turducken dear
They scarf it down with Britney Spears
I would not eat it at SFN
Though I can burn it with Evolgen
I would not stuff it with a grouse
or feed it to Jason Rosenhouse
I would not eat it day or night
I hear it goes well with Miller Lite
Stuffing birds brings me no joy
Does it matter if the birds are girl or boy?
I would not eat it with a cake
I would not eat it with Snowflake
I would not eat it despite your wishes
It's as revolting as Abel's dishes
I do not like it fried, stuffed, and huge
I'll feed it to the chimp refuge
How many birds can be fit into one?
We'll need some math to see it done
I do not like turducken fried,
I do not like it Omni-fied!
Fried turducken has BEEN DENIED!!!!